ABLUTIONS AND THINGS....

           in Africa.........?
 

Dear Diary,

Every morning, after getting rid of the lord and master...I adjourn to the bathing room to ablute.........which this morning reminded me of some rather odd times, here in exotic Africa.......... Lionesses have this odd penchant for bathing, this takes place after mating and feeding, usually about four to five times a day......the feeding that is...............the mating depends on the season, for both genders....although, the male lion mates up to 3000 times in a year......excuse me, I am not an expert, only well informed......not sure if they mate with the same lady all the time.........can't be...she would be worn out!
 

I'm getting side tracked..........anyway...I have a very interested audience when I bathe......four Yorkshire Terriers and a "stoep special"........ten large brown eyes that watch my every movement, lick my fat legs from ankle to dimpled knees, and generally smell of Ralph Laurens' "Safari"........................like their mistress.......... Sometimes they smell of "Montanna" by Montanna.......nu? ..never mind... but with this in mind, it started me thinking of the places that I have bathed in..........from Zinc tubs to rushing waterfalls, huge concrete storage tanks and the showers here in the bush.....buckets with holes, and a string that you pull to tip the water down...........naked in the freezing sea......and the BEST! of course was in Abidjan.......I mention this, because I was brought up with the French attitude of never going anywhere with out a "bidet".......there to my delight, were the remains of the French "baignoire"......(oy! my spelling!) wherever I went there was a bidet..........magnificent porcelain ones, beaten copper ones, some had been stripped from ancient neglected hotels and were being sold in the market places.....some where being used to store food in, some had flowers in them, and the best use of all, was at the "still" in Assine..........I'm sure I told you about the "still?"
This delectable, delicious, hunk of a guide, (he was Sudanese), took Lord Ha Ha and me on a trip across a lake.....Ebrie lake, this is a water expanse of some 200 miles!!!!!

We stopped at an island, and met the family who were living there......what they do, is move onto an island, wherever there is a certain kind of Palm growing....can't think of the name..... Anyway.......this Palm reaches maturity only once in its life then dies....so the family set up home, built wonderful cane houses, and set about, by first sending up the trees, one of their ablest young children. He, not unlike a monkey, climbs to the top, and bores a huge hole in the tree, which has a "heart" of about, 1 1/2 meters    ......inserts a stick and hangs a little tin from this stick.
Everyday, they take this sweet tasting white sticky stuff, and put it into a barrel. By the time the barrel is full, it has begun to ferment.....and they then light a fire under this, from which is the strangest arrangement of coiled copper piping emanates, which somehow is led into and through the water of the river, and has an end, which is balanced onto the edge of a pan, from which drips, almost pure alcohol ! 65% proof!...........then they bottle this and sell it....very cheap...I might add.......($4.00 per bottle), which even has a cork carved from Palm wood............
This particular family had these gleaming pans made of copper and on closer inspection, I discovered, to the amusement of Lord Ha Ha, that they were old "bidets!" He was laughing so much at what they had been used for, that he did not notice, much to my relief, my partaking of the wicked brew ....eventually I joined in the merriment, when I began to demonstrate exactly what these contraptions were actually made for.

Which naturally led to the family joining in, and pouring friendly tots of their produce for everyone to sample which, of course, led to "mama" bringing out stools to sit on, food to eat, music to be played and joining me in the demonstrations, which they thought was some form of dance. This almost ended in my abandoning my "Western" ideals and insisting on forsaking all to live there ....forever...........................

I slept most of the way back.....needless to say....we were hours late in returning to the hotel, and caused great consternation with the "Inn keeper," who, although very much a Frenchman himself, was more worried about the cost of his boat than our safety! We had to stop him sacking the guide!
My younger son still has a bottle of this "Palm wine" as they called it, in his room, and when ever I go into this "African cave" I can't help smiling at the memories.......aaaaaahhhhhhhhh.....that's all we have in the end isn't it? That and friends....................bye, much love
bev