BARBIE'S NIGHTMARE

Dear Diary,

My really special friend, Barbara, accompanied me on a business trip to Germany as you know.
Now, never mind what she had to put up with, Beverly being her usual manic, workaholic, sightseeing and suchlike self.

But the poor girlie had to put up with the ghosts of my dear departed grandparents as well!

Düsseldorf
 

It was a beautiful sunny morning. Barbara and I, dressed "to the nines," were all set on antique shops, and as many different coffee shops as we could find.

We chanced upon a delightful looking establishment, (antique shop) set back a bit, as opposed to a pavement entrance. In fact, one had to follow down a form of passage, that had huge glass display cases on either side. Excitedly, we turned, intending to hurry into the shop, when, naturally, I glanced left and right.......there to MY HORROR!!!!!!!, I saw these displays......

One the one side, in an area of approx. 10 metres long and 2 metres wide, were thousands of antique fob-watches. Gold, silver, mixed. Patterned, plain, beaten, shiny and a couple (maybe tarnished)!

Right from the top of the window, all over the base, hanging from metal trees, display on boards: Fob chains, with links and various charms, keys and some even had jewels, set in tiny casings.

In the other window, equally as large, were thousands of items of almost the exact same precious jewellery.......all ladies, all garnet, ruby and gold. All earrings, bracelets, and pins.......thousands thousands, hanging, lying and draped.

NOWHERE!!!!!!! not even in the Victoria and Albert museum in London, have I ever seen such a display. It was IMPOSSIBLE!!!!!!!!!

I nearly went insane.!!!

Given that I am a very emotional person, also not known for my ability to control these same emotions, Barbara, had her hands full. I was crying....sobbing and performing....I kept saying......." Barbie, Barbie,".....she had to literally ? drag me off...I wanted to smash the windows...I wanted to call the police????? ( I was a little insane)

A little later, when I had calmed down, with the emergency aid of brandy and coffee and two smokes at once.....(on top of which I had not smoked in 6 years!) We discussed the issue.

Now Barbie is the most Anglo Saxon, blond gorgeous chick.......also a little batty...I only have batty friends... (die hards) .
She suggested that we forget shopping, and call it a day!.....me? oh!no! NOW I was all set for more punishment! (remembering that I had dealt in antiques for many many years!)..never, no-where, not in London, or any place in Europe, had I ever, seen such displays!!!!!!!!!!...

No, now I had to go and look for more antique shops. I found many, all the same, some were specialist shops, with only one product, e.g Antique wine shop, glass shop, lamp shop, etc.

One antique toy shop was beyond imagination!............there were so many priceless toys, dolls, mechanical sets.......IT IS NOT POSSIBLE TO SUCH A COLLECTION IN THE HANDS OF ONE PRIVATE DEALER!
I know, I used to collect the same.

The museums of the world have every single doll, toy, etc, itemized, history dates etc....these? he didn't know, his father had acquired them.......lots were not for sale! ......I could hear the children crying.........

When we got back to were we were staying, I had to phone home....my poor old man..(AGAIN!) ...he was all set to fly over and come and fetch me..

If you think, that this was a figment of my imagination, hear this.....

A few days later, we boarded a ship, we were on a trip down the Rhine; every village that we stopped at, we noticed this enormous population of elderly, fit, beer swilling, heil Hitler types...... I had ceased speaking,.....I just wanted to go home.

Later still, by perhaps a few days, we met up with two American couples, in a Heidelberg café.........total strangers, (I warned you I speak to everybody)....

a couple of Irish coffees later.........the one chap remarks to me, having heard from Barbie that I am Jewish, that on their trip down the Rhine, they couldn't help noticing the......quote....."one hellava lot of ex-army type folk around!" "gee honey," says the other, "must be kinda hard for you?"

Needless to say it got slightly worse.
 


Barbie's friends whom we stayed with in ....( I forget)...they were in fact not friends, but the parents of a doctor, who had done his housemanship in East London..........they had a beautiful home, filled with art....
 

The lady of the house opened up her crockery cupboards? one day, on hearing that I was interested in antiques......there they were...........hundreds of priceless collections of dinnerware.........me? I didn't speak....mentally I was packing up and leaving...Barbie,......."oh Mrs. So 'n So...where did you get all of that?" .........."ach, my dear...it vas a collection thet mine modder end fader managed to ....collecting?...duringk the var!"
 


I rest my case. As you can imagine, this was too mucking futch for me.

I will never go back to Germany. Never.

I prefer the honest people who say, bloody Jew, yid.....or whatever....I can handle that.............its only names.............Heavens, but I do go on..............Is it because I am morbid?????????
 
 

On a more cheerful note, due to the fact that I am looking for a new job, and because it is time, I have managed to loose 4 kilos.............clap clap. Well done Beverly.

Also, in anticipation of having to don a swimming costume, in the near future, being as my spouse has bought another home, on the Marina, in Port Alfred, (one million rand plus minus) which of course we do not need....however, I shall have my revenge, as I am to furnish this mansion, and am not known for my...my....thriftiness?

Nevertheless, my dogs will love it..they can now breathe life in to the quiet, conservative neighbourhood..........chase all the cars, crap on everyone's lawn and ,I'm sure, I shall have them all....all those jolly sailor/sun-downer types, on the internet soon........... take care!

I'm sure too, that they will all love my elder son's "Heavy Metal music"?????????

I leave you, as usual, with regret...............

shalom......*kisses*,

bev