Summary of success stories
Credit Sue Price
This was originally an email sent to me on one of the remailers ...
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**This is a summary of a great thread on Brenda C's Trich Page. Someone
asked if there were people out there who were pull free for at least 6
months, and how did they do it. Reading the responses one after the
other, many by people who I've known since they first became pull free,
was really inspiring. In summarizing I've tried to retain all the points
each person made.
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**Person 1: June 29 will be her one-year anniversary of being pull free.
She credits God, fish oil, and the support, encouragement and tips she
got at Brenda's site.
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**Person 2: She has been in recovery for almost 10 months. Most days
have been pull free, but she has pulled some days, and has had 38 "spree
days". Part of her ongoing success, she feels, is that she accepts that
she is not perfect in her recovery, so that her slips do not cause her
to lose her recovery.
**"Progress Not Perfection" is her motto. She is now able to go without
a hat for the first time in 12 years. She had a list of 25 things she
does to stay in recovery. See the thread on Brenda's site for the full
details, but I'll try to summarize.
**20 of the 25 were cognitive or behavioral techniques. Behavioral:
wears a hat when she feels strong urges, uses stress toys, etc.
Cognitive: a lot of affirmations, also several things she does to keep
motivation high, such as:
!
* She takes a monthly photo of her hair, so she can see the progress.
This also keeps her from examining her hair every day, which can be a
trigger.
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* She posts her stats on a calendar. It's motivating to see so many
squares marked with the symbol she uses to indicate a pull free day.
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* She keeps a "positive journal" about herself
!
*The remaining items on her list fall in the categories of health and
support. She tries to get enough sleep because being tired is a trigger
for her, and tries to avoid sweets and coffee. She started a support
group in her town and has been in the local paper about it, and gets and
gives support through the boards and online chat on Brenda C's Page, and
through email and phone calls.
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**Person 3: has not pulled for almost 5 months. What has worked for her:
she has taken up crafts which keeps her hands busy and added enjoyable
hobbies to her life. She exercises and eats properly -- has lost 30 lbs.
She is getting a tan, doing her nails. All these ways that she has
improved her appearance, keeps her motivated to not pull. She nurtures
her spiritual side through her pets and meditation.
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**Person 4: She was up to 306 (as of last week) completely pull free
days, after 29 years of pulling. She believes she is in recovery because
she turned it over to God. She knew she could not do it on her own.
**When she began to battle trich, she analyzed why trich was in her
life. She came to the conclusion that it was a comfort and coping
mechanism, an escape from her problems by going into that trance.
**Then she started facing life and handling her problems, relying on God
to get her through her ups and downs. It was tough at first, she went
through a stage much like withdrawal, with physical and emotional
discomfort. Her husband held her hands as she fell asleep so she
wouldn't put them in her hair. She later started holding koosh balls all
night. Over time she needed them less and now doesn't need them at all.
**Things are easier once she got over the withdrawal stage. She came
onto Brenda's site and started posting a lot, and got so much support
and knew she wasn't alone and wasn't crazy.
**Today, by facing her problems and facing life, she has taken the need
for pulling out of her life. Her grandmother died recently which in the
past would have driven her to baldness, but this time she faced the pain
with the help from God, and did not pull at all.
**The rest is in her words, I really love those affirmations - some of
the best I've seen!
"Things that I would suggest to help and that I know have helped me
are...
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1. Stay motivated (posting on the board and reading posts will
help do this)
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2. Keep your awareness up (note when you are pulling, why you are
pulling and how much you have pulled)
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3. Set small goals (1 day, then 2 days, 3 days, a week etc...)
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4. Replace negative behaviors with positive ones
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5. Handle all your problems (don't let anything stew)
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6. Relax (deal with stress and get it out of your way)
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7. Examine your entire life to see where trich came into it and what
part it plays in your life
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8. Check out behavior and cognitive therapy (they can both be great)
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9. Study trich and learn all that you can about it (possible causes,
treatments etc...)
**Everyday, I tell myself...
"I used to pull my hair, but that is a thing of my past."
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"Today is here and this is now, and today, I no longer pull out my
hair."
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"Pulling out my hair is something that I can no longer do."
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"I just can't do it."
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"I may have an urge to pull out my hair and I can't help that, but I can
help how I respond to that urge."
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"I can respond to an urge by saying, "NO!" I don't have to say
"YES!"
!
"This is my hand and I am in control of it and I don't have to let it
raise to my head, to pull out my hair, just because an urge tells it to
do so."
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**Person 5: pull free for over a year. Her tips:
* keep a positive attitude
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* Do something to keep your hands occupied at all times, even in bed
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* Be true to yourself. If someone has upset you, say so
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* Get rid of negative people in your life, even if they are family
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* Learn to say no
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* Enjoy self time
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**Person 6: got to 6 months pull free but slipped, now is at one week pf
after renewing her sense of worth. She feels it is important to work on
acceptance and get over the shame. She has told her friends and
co-workers, has been in the newspaper, maintains the local support
group. "You have to want it bad enough first." She believes we all can
do it.
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